If you are going to invest in yourself, then DO IT! And go all the way.
Go for the handmade and custom, skip the store bought/ massed produced crap.
Yes, it does cost more. Because it actually cost more to make it. Quality is worth it. Plus you are supporting another woman.
What’s missing from the mass produced/made to throw away and later forget about, is the character of detail.
It’s so much more interesting to look at something hand crafted with great care. The texture, the color and quality all so much better with high quality, crafted by a human not a machine. Plus when you have custom jewelry made just for you, you get to pick ALL the details. Nothing feels more luxurious than that. And to me that is great self care and self love. It’s not settling for almost good enough. If you are going to invest in something beautiful, do it! Don’t go half way.
Which brings me to another point:
Why do women think it’s a mortal sin to spend money on themselves or buy nice things?
Why do we feel guilt for taking care of ourselves?
I was recently talking to my sister on the phone. She was lamenting about having lost something and then said, “I guess that’s what I get for buying something nice for myself.”
My response was no, that is blatantly untrue. It is not bad luck to do for yourself, which sometimes includes treating yourself.
It’s called self care.
And you absolutely DID NOT bring bad luck on yourself for being good to you.
It is absolutely none of my business how anyone spends their money. But let’s stop the nonsense of feeling guilty when we buy something fabulous just because.
You might go to Target and spend ungodly amounts on all the pretties that in the moment you could not live without. And you may walk out thinking, “what the hell did I just do?”. Because you really don’t “need” any of it, and then later find 100 reasons to rationalize why you do: Because damn it, those pillows had to be bought, the sofa needed them. Or damn it, the kids needed those new sheets, even though you know you have 4 sets already… or you “needed” that new gadget, because your life can’t go on without it. Said gadget somehow makes life livable/so much easier for you and/or your family…
Then you see the price tag on a new pair of handmade or custom earrings and think, “Oh, I can’t spend $245 on myself.” Knowing full well you just dropped twice that on something for your kids/house/spouse/partner…
It’s okay to do nice things for yourself. And if you feel all the feels of guilt for doing it, you take away all the feels of joy. In fact, you are letting guilt suck the absolute joy out of the experience of wearing your new earrings.
If you didn’t need anyone’s approval for that Target trip, then why do you think you need approval for something just for you.
If you have extra “I worked damn hard for that!” cold hard moola/little “just for you” fund, then it feels good to do something for yourself.
If you are not making yourself a priority, then who is?
Your world cannot run without you. And treating yourself like the Queen you are is healthy. It’s okay to celebrate you.
My mom used to do this kind of thing. For that matter, she still does to some degree. Sacrifice is a noble thing. But it depletes you. Stop.
(IMO she is an amazing mom. She would give you the last morsel of food she has and the shirt off her back. I love her for that.)
A depleted mom/partner/woman/human is not doing all the good she can in the world.
But a satisfied and happy one can.
I have been there and done that.
And a prime example of how I did it recently is wearing old running shoes for WAY too long and I ended up with a hurt foot that is taking months to heal. This is a direct reflection of me not taking care of me. Doing for my kids and not including new running shoes in my priorities.
But I paid a price. And the foot pain was in no way worth it. I had to learn a valuable lesson in self care.
Put yourself as a top priority!
Then you can be your best and bring all the world ALL of your magic and gold.